I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
