So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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