Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Randomize