Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Randomize