I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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