Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
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The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
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I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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