yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
