you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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