just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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