I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
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you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
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He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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