she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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