so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize