i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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