the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
He did a backflip because drugs
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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