Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
