We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
