i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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