At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
