remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
My vagina is officially offended.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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