apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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