Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
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How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
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I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
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