Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
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