shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
