She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
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Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
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Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock