Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
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it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
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as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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