Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
