Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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