Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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