I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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