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We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Randomize
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