she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
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