I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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