So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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