Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He shit in the fireplace
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize