i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Randomize
