Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize