direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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