I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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