It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
