Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize
