You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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