I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
