I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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