I want to stick my p in your. b.
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize