I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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