P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
she told me i tasted like america
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
