girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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