It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
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