Duck Duck Cougar?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
