TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize